Assalamualaikum Peeepzzzzz....

Amacama semua beraya??? mesti Gerekz sehhhhhhhh...haha..Ingat..jgn mkn banyak2..nanti weight yg diturunkan pada bulan puasa naik lah plak...

Ckp pasal weight nih kan..muahaahaha!! DEngan tak tahu malu nyer aku ckp..semmgnyer..weight aku dah naik agaknyer..Semua rumah aku pergi..Konferm!!!! Konferm!!! Kena Tegur...Abang aku...dengan aku jadi sasaran...ADa yg ckp direct plak tuh...Naaaaabehhhh~ "Cik..Cik..Hal-hal ukuran nih sensitip tao" Hehe...
Whatever it is, I need to shed some of this Lemak berkrim..AKu mmeessti!!! Tak boleh jadi gini...Patutlah aku tgk..penyakit aku makin bertambah..ishk-ishk! Mesti start dari skg...No nanti-nanti..Ni tmrw..tmrw..
Kalau Suhaimi Boleh..Aku boleh!!!!!
Muahahhaa!!!!

Dan maklumlah, setelah SEMINGGU cuti raya..duk umah...Terpaksa ku heret diri yang tak bermaya nih pergi kerja nari...Hehe..maklumlah dah terbiasa duk rumah...DAn Malang nasib ku..Tidak berbau.. Partner aku.. MC!! CILAKO! TErpaksa aku handle semua sorang-sorang...nasib baiklah kan...hujung mingggu..kalau MONDAY..Nak Ngamok ajer aku...
Muahaha...Dan..nih part ada sikit touching.Biasalah kan kalau dah partner aku tak dtg...Bekas aku tuh..nak menyelit ajer..ngn aku..so terjadi lah satu..session' luahkan perasaan"
Hah...nak tahu tak apa citer...Tunggu episod seterusnyer di masa akan dtg..huahuaha...
Penatlah nak citer...hehe..besok2 ar...:)

Buhbyez!!!!

Hari Raya..Pastinya ramai insan yang akan berbahagia..si samping.keluarga tercinta...kekasih yang disayangi..dan ada juga yang akan tangisi permergian orang yang dikasihi..

Bagi aku...Tiada apa ertinyer gembira pada hari ini...Ya! aku mungkin gembira dpt luangkan masa bersama setiap ahli keluarga ku...tapi dalam masa yang sama..hati ini merintih..meraung kerana telah dilukai..buat ke...ke....ntah lah keberapa kali. beribu-ribu maaf telah aku berikan..tapi mengapa manusia tidak pernah insaf akan kesilapan yang telah dilakui. Aku sedar diri ini jua tidak terlepas dari melakukan kesilapan demi kesilapan..Namum setiap hari aku menilai dan menitik beratkan setiap perjalanan ini..supaya aku dapat memperbaiki hidup ini...

Ya ALlah!!! Tapi Mengapa..pada saat ini...berita yang telah aku terima...menghancurkan hati ini. Mmg berita ini aku yang mengundangnyer sendiri...bukan kerana tidak mempercayai..tapi aku tidak mahu diri ini diperdayakan lagi. semmgnyer tiada niat pun..tapi its just by coincidence perkara ini stelah disebutkan..AKu ini bukan boneka...tapi manusia ciptaanmu yang mempunyai perasaan. Mengapa dier harus selindungkan perkara sebenarnya daripada aku...Aku hanya mahu kebenaran...itu saja yang aku minta.. Aku tidak meminta wang ringgit..atau harta...atau darjat atau kedudukan...tapi kejujuran. Begitu besar ker permintaan ini ya allah.

*sing*menjelang Hari Raya..berakhirlah puasa...cebedah!!! hehe

hmmm..* looks at the time* its already past 12am...That means lagik sehari jer nak raya!! Yeah!! Muahaha..

So i guess by now..semua org dah mosltly prepared to welcome the special occasion. Hari kemenagan setelah sebulan berpuasa..kuih-muih gerenti semua dah prepared..langsir dah digantung...ah...yg masih belom gantun langsir tuh..jgn plak buat last minit..kalau nak tunggu malam raya..haiz..nampka nye lambat lah tido..kena ingat jugak first day raya..nak kena bangun awal..kang nanti terlajak lah plak noh...

So tadi aku bantu membantu lah di dapur..tolong potong lada...kopek bawang..and cucuk sate...
Ahh..meh kiter tgk gambar..

Muahaha...itu sate ayam..sate daging..siang2 mak aku dah pi cucuk..Hehe

K enuf of food, aku ingat arituh nak gi facial lah kan..tapi rasa2 nya cam tak sempat..maklumlah kan..raya lagi sehari ajer..so aku buat jer lah apa yg patut.

Muahaha..muker cramp...nak senyum pon tak boleh. Actually kan this entry is just plainly merepek...takder bender nak tulis..bt this fingers just need to practice its typing skills.hahha

Ok..but u guys should see this..how adorable my niece is..

Im at a point of breaking down..im turning shaky...and by the time im unable to control it anymore.

O Allah...Pls give me all the strength that i need. I admit i have not been religiously good but by nature humans like me will always voice out to u, Whenever they are surrounded by problems, only to u we will succumb.I can possibly lie to all those people out there that everything is fine...but i cant deny the fact that everything have went wrong..and everything is not alright. This ramadan was indeed the most challenging one. O Allah, i cant pretend anymore...I cant pretend to be alright when the fact that deep down inside im yelling and hoping that someone could hear me and bring me out of this darkness im currentlly in.

O Allah...My tears just couldnt stop flowing whenever i think of it. whatever that reminds me of it..i tend to be much more sensitive. What did i do till i cant reach just a lil bit of happines..??Why do the gave me this kind of treatment when i never did them wrong...? Why am i being label too good?? Isnt that better...to know someone good..or do u need me to go back to my oldself to fit into them.. Do u want me to remove my hijab just to prove to them..that im not a good girl? Do u want me to puff that cigarette again just to prove to them that i fit into them? Will they like me, if i became like that. O allah, im not perfect..ive done too much sin that i do not want to add more...Or issit that i have sin a lot that till even i change to be a better person..people still doesnt want to accept who am i. and being too good became the reason now.

O Allah, i just couldnt help it...I always ask myself..when does this gonna end..As much as i want it to end, i want it to end in happiness not bitterness. Ive went thru a lot...and i do now want to go thru all over again. Its no point if im the only one who stand strong to prove them wrong..but some parties...have begin to look down and about to give up..My future is so blur..my vision is blur..i cant even see where i stand in the nx 10 years.

Oh Allah..i beg for ur forgiveness..Only you who knoe how i feel..and how things are...Pls give me the patience..the brain to think wisely for me to settle the problems im holding on to. Pls show me the way..coz as time pass by..i culdnt hold on longer..For sure...one day..i will bring up the white flag and say i surrender...~

A week more of Ramadhan....and a week more to Hari Raya...

Recall back during our younger days...while we are still a kid. how the thought of Hari Raya really brings a smile to our face. The thought of the Kuih-muih...the lampu lap lip..the nice food during breaking of fast..and the most wonderful one..is "duit Raya".

How time really flies...??

Now...we have to prepare the kuih muih..instead of finishing up all the kuih on th e dining table...we have to pasang the lampu lap lip..instead of just watchin how the colours actually...blinking..and how it change on its own...Haha..we have to prepare n cook the food..rather than just sit a the table..all food already served...and we have to give Zakat...instead of getting the duit raya..Hehe..As we grow older, sometimes we feel that Raya is just another day..no specialities..but the puasa make it significant..

As for me, whenever Raya came...i always though of my grandma who have left her sons, daughter, grandchildren,great grandchildren..how i miss her so much~My granddad spent most of his time at kampung..and im sure he'll be back this festive season..but only when is the qn. how we use to gather all our family at grandma's place in the morning...my cuzzie all came in their boria traditional clothes...sighz..
But now..i spent my morning at home..with my shirts n pants. while my parents went for their Raya Prayers..i will prepare the food at home...then..we will eat..and i have to change to a more nicer clothes for the forgiving sessions..and ended up changing to my normal clothings again. and after dat...i will relaxing infront of the tv...then sleep...and wake up again...and prepare for the food for night..Only the night of hari Raya give me the spirits of the festival..all my cuzzins will be visiting..so i will be busy always at night..haha...

Preparation for hari raya this years...is ala kadar...i only got one baju Kurang....match with D baju kurung...a bag...thats it.hehe..

Oklah nitghtie peepz..~

This is the first entry to my blog using my new laptop..Heee...im starting to love this laptop of mine...i shall treat it as my hubby...khekhekhe...Eversince, i own this laptop.my night aint any bore anymrore...When i got nuthing to do..the laptop is just a stretch away....

a lot of things have been happening in my life...ive been changed to alpha shift. Although i may not like it so much...i still have to take that decision..im just an employee. I try to adjust myself to the shift..with abg anan..i m ok..but the main people..the spco...arghh..just couldnt help it. Im starting to feel the impact of the shift change...it has turn out to extreme boredom especially weekends. Although i have the freedom to do anything i want, I still find it bored.

I start to miss my old shift...I much more looking forward to my OT rather than my own shift. This is becoz i will be doing overtime in my old shift. I miss those people..especially..abang g n farouk...they are the few which leave a mark in my daily routine at werk. They are just a bunch of crazy and happy people..cant stop from making anybody laugh..They shine my day at work..but now its as gloomy as ever...sighz...

Adding to it, all the politic in my department...is driving me crazy...how shattered i was hen i found out one of my fren was actually a permanent staff...but tell everybody she just a contract like us..how painful it is to have a boss who favours people. Only those who knoe how to membodek will get what they want...but what can i do..im not the type and i dunnoe how to membodek..i stand right on my own feet and i dun owe anybody anything. That is something i should be proud of myself....HEhe...

Okok..my hiccups is irritating me damn lot!!! i betta go... c ya~

MISSION ACCOMPLISH

Salamz...Bloggerz...

Am listening to a Hari Raya Song " Dari Jauh ku pohon Maaf" Awwww..so Touching...Haiz...selalu gini lah..everytime dgr lagu raya jer..syahdu dier semcm...

Anyway..i had a long n tired day today. My partner was on MC and nobody came in OT to backup..so left me ALONE to struggle thorughout the day. Cleared allt he problems...took me 3/4 of the day....i just do what i can lah. Kalau tak..i wanted to take MC in the morning due to my slight migraine..but since..my partner in MC..so takkan aku nak MC jugak..so dtg ajer lah kerja kan..hehe

And..memandangkan my partner MC, i have to "buka' with my ex.Just the two of us. Ishk...i feel so uncomfortable and akward..but what to do i have to...