I feel like breaking down...

Looking whatever that happens...and now my friends are adding on to it..I have to put up with thier karenah. What bloody hell?
Apa salah aku, sampai drg nak seksa hidup aku mcm gini nih...
Nak salahkan drg, aku tak mampu..mungkin drg tak tahu cam mana keadaan aku sebenarnya..
But to hear that ur friend say that u failed in being patience with them..is totally heartbreaking!!
Apa...tak cukup ker semua yang aku lalui ni...nak kena put up ngan kerja..yg tak habis-habis..kawan yang lupe kawan..kawan yg ada matair terus lesap..biler single jer carik aku balik...
kawan yg kesibukan dengan kerja..dan aku kena put up with my family condition now..my dad is sick in hospital..takleh jalan..soon he'll be back home..and each of us need one another..to care for my dad..thats means..i got to put all my time at home in par with my work..Isnt that patience enuf...???? Berapa byk patience yang nak lagi nih?? Kalau org lain..boleh drg telan nih semua..cukup masa..breakdown...
My fren,
Maybe to u i was not patience enuf to put up with ur business of work and music lifestyle..ur shows, ur performance, ur training...but think abt it, if i were not patience enuf..i would have just screamed my highest pitch voice at ya..and just ask u to get lost...from my life..and never come back again..
but what did i do? Despite..having to entertain ur favourite phase of "calling me back"..i still msg u..and call u..at times...just to check on how ur doing..i dint forget u..i did not screamed at u..i did not ignore you..i still put a moment of my time to think abt u...to wonder whether ur ok...
I dunnoe whether is there a need for u to c whether im serius..and i dun even know y do u need to c whether im serius..all u ans was " i tak tahu..tapi kiter kan kawan..kawan ok per"
And did i ever ask for more? did i ever ask to be more than friends? maybe u like me? maybe u wanted to c whether i suits to be ur dearly wifey...but u dont even know me..how could u say that i failed to be patience with u..
Fren..afterall..its up to u. if u think..i failed..by all means..to me..im still trying to stand strong down here..despite at times..i feel shaky and like breaking down..
If u are destined to be my other half..i welcome u with my open heart...if not..im glad u were a friend in my lifetime.

Sorry to say this but at times i feel that guys are such a pain in the ass!!!